Today I asked Eddie what his thoughts are on the subject of self defense and firearms. I should have known that was a loaded subject (pun intended), but the reply really threw me for a loop. He looks me in the eye ans says: "Let me ask you this: Would you shoot a guy to watch him die?" I was floored by the question, and by the time I got out a reply, he said "Nope, too late. You're already dead." That surprised me, as it was intended to do, I'm sure. It also made me think a LOT. So much thinking that I was pretty bad at doing my job for the next couple hours after that lunchtime discussion. Glad it wasn't a hot (urgent) job, I kept dropping things. 

What I gained from that is that you have to KNOW what you are going to do LONG before the perp. ever breaks into your home. Will YOU do it? I have in my possession the means to protect my family at any cost. Will I use it, if it ever becomes necessary, and will I have the wisdom to know when that moment is? 

Do I know my answer yet? No, but I won't be wasting Dory's last 10 JHP rounds just yet. These things keep pretty much forever. I still need to mull things over, it was a lot to take in. It brings up the fear and anxiety after the break in in April. Thanks goodness I wasn't home. But as I think about it, I think "what if I WAS home?" What might have happened? I'm not sure that I really want to know after all. Mind, I'm not about to unlock the carbine (it's a carbine fer cryin' out loud, it's three feet long!) and stick it under my pillow just yet, nor am I about to run out and buy a pistol and a box of fragmenting ammo, but it is something to discuss further, and do a lot of soul searching on. I just discovered how big and bad the world can be, and how fast things can change, whether for better or worse. 

I'm going to go look for  a hug now, and some low fat chocolate.